My ramblin' thoughts today refer not only to Memorial Day 2003, but holidays in general. Many of you know I'm a retail manager. What does this mean schedule-wise? Working HOLIDAYS (to get that one extra sale competitors that are closed give-up) NIGHTS, and giving-up the luxury of NO SET SCHEDULE of 9-5, M-F, if that's what one strives for. About once a month it's not unusual for me to be in the store well past closing...11pm-12mid or my last "all-nighter" was to 2am. Why? So that YOU can shop 7-days a week, 12 hrs a day, without really appreciating the time and effort that's necessary to keep a store running. Similar to many operations, some activities go unnoticed, and behind the scenes. There's NEVER the option to slow-down, close-down or even break-down...usually I'll go in the office and swear, straighten my pocket protector, and hit-the-ground-running again. Today was just as I thought it would be; customers trickled-in. No big rush. Sales barely paid a portion of the rent or electricity bill of approximately $5000/mo. I would rather have been on my roof-top, admiring the awesome view of Puget Sound, The Space Needle and downtown, drinking a beer, and thinking that I can do this because others died. Whether you agree with war or not, I cringe every time I see the typical Seattle-Socialist vehicles blastered with various glib anti-war or anti-"anything good" slogans.(yeah, I love meat too!) Please, get real! I can feel proud that my Dad served in WWII, and was one of the many millions of non-jews(the typical news-story never dare tells) that was lucky to survive 2 of the most notorious camps in Nazi history, Auswhitz and Buchenwald. He was barely 20 and escaped to England. He was a man of world, spoke 4 languages well, travelled to all continents and was lucky to meet a lady that I would later call Mom. Dad died Nov. 2000. He and I always had a tenuous relationship, but his life was permanently colored by his past. Although he was a naturalized citizen, he never bought-into the "American Way". It took me a long time to realize this. It's because of guys like my Dad, that you can sit and watch baseball, drink a beer, drive a 12 mpg vehicle and feel, "wow, life is good!"

I don't usually reflect much on the past, at least not as it relates to me personally, but when I do, it's usually in quiet contemplation. All those decades...The somewhat "big" events of civilization that I have lived through and a few I remember very well; The Vietnam War and the return of refugees to the Bay Area on chartered 747's into Oakland. Watergate (ugg!). The "Sexual Revolution" of the 70's when women were divorcing their husbands at record rates and finding themselves in the job market. And when steak-and-scotch was the center of every patio BBQ's. Mary Tyler Moore, Carly Simon and Kiss. Every decade had it's Pop icons, and the 70's had plenty. Hip Hop was still in an inner-city womb, and only if you were CEO or on the elite list of the top wealthiest socialites, did you have a "cell phone"...For you youngsters, it was a "Mobile Operator" that was contacted to place the call, usually from the back of a Lincoln Limo or some other ghastly vehicle. Airbags did exist, but nobody cared and the primitive state of technology made the car companies cringe at trying to convince consumers to spend on this "frivolty".

3 weeks ago, I turned 3-9, hence 3-3-9. Am I feeling "old"? Physically not at all, but psychologically I sometimes feel older. I was surprised at how many cards I received this year, more than last. Even before my 39th others were asking me what I'll be doing for the BIG 4-0? For me, the whole age-thing is totally blown-out of proportion in our society. Who cares! And why is it almost everyone is obsessed with knowing others age! I freely will tell others, IF they ask. It just doesn't occur to me to hide it. It's funny how (especially women, but more men now) stammer when anything that might reveal their age comes up in a conversation. As if it's some big faux-pas. There's a double standard. I dislike it when the same people who are "ageless" and a mystery, harrass others blantantly in a social context about their age. Get a life! There's so many other things more important to be concerned about.

What made me write all this drival? I was thinking about my Dad and his birthday this week. How he was my age now, when I was born. Amazing. If I had gone the "Married-With-Children" route, I would probably have at least 3 and likely divorced. I spared many I feel by waiting and finding out better what I needed from life. Old Dad has been gone since 2000. His life was very colorful, and due to self-abuse died too early, even for a guy pushing 80. Next year will be much the same for me as other age-mileposts in life: 13,18,21,30 and now 40. I won't think much about it. It's just a number.